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Monday, January 09, 2006

 

The Gift That Keeps on Hurting

With a birthday coming up in a couple weeks, I've been in something of a reflective mood. Because this birthday marks the beginning of one of those named decades in a person's life, like your "twenties" (soon gone for yours truly), that reflection might easily turn to brooding were it not for the positives of a great wife, wonderful family, my health, yada yada yada. Given a pretty good situation overall, I felt marginally justified in spending a little of that reflecting time answering the question of just what I might find to be a welcome gift for the occasion. I think for adults men finding gifts is a bit challenging. I outgrew action figures in the 11th grade. Really, the best gift would be enough money to retire early, say at 30. Given the rather unrealistic possibility of that, I perused the Cards' official online shop to find something that might be a suitable replacement for twenty years of work-free bliss. What did I find? While thinking about maybe getting a customized "Bartman 03" jersey (eventhough the karmatic implications of such a thing would be heavy indeed), I came across something that possessed even more entertainment value. Lo and behold, the official J.D. Drew Replica jersey!!! Now you can relive your favorite J.D. Drew moments, such as: - His sixth career stint on the DL in August of 2003 with an oblique injury. - Tendinitis in right knee from late June thru mid-July of 2002 - A lower back sprain in August of 2001, And many, many more of your favorites, which are sure to be some of LaRussa's favorites too. Maybe, I'll just ask for a gift certificate, unless the Cub fans I know have already chipped in for a Juan Encarnacion jersey. On second thought, maybe the Drew jersey would be better after all.
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